Can you hear my heart beating like a hammer?
Beating like a hammer?
Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammerHard to be soft
Tough to be tender
Come take my pulse, the pace is on a runaway train
Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer
'Bella, it's time to wake up.' I heard my mother's voice calling me.
I slowly opened my eyes to find myself back in my old bedroom in Phoenix. The sunlight was streaming through the curtains, promising a beautiful day ahead. I sat up and looked around. Everything was neatly in place as it had been that morning seven years before. I climbed out of my bed and walked toward the kitchen where I could hear my Mom fixing breakfast.
When I reached the doorway, I stood and watched her busily cracking eggs into a bowl while bacon sizzled on the stove. She was wearing her favorite t-shirt and jeans as she puttered around, singing along with a song on the radio. It had been so long, and I missed her so much.
Suddenly she looked up. When she saw me, she gave me an indulgent smile. 'There you are.' She said before setting the bowl on the counter and walking over to me. 'Did you forget about school?' She asked with a smile before taking my hands in hers.
'Mom, I'm not in school any more. I'm even finished with college now.' I whispered.
'I'm aware of that honey and I can't wait to see you graduate.' She announced happily. 'But Bella, you have to wake up in order to do that.' She squeezed my hands then 'You have to wake up, and you have to be brave and strong.' She then wrapped her arms around me and whispered in my ear 'You have to fight. You can do this Bella.'
Suddenly my mother was gone; vanished while embracing me. A shiver went through me as I registered a feeling of being cold and wet. I looked down to find the front of my shirt saturated in blood and clinging to my skin.
Her blood.
My stomach lurched and my head throbbed as I forced my eyes open.
I lay very still as my eyes searched my surroundings. I was lying across the back seat of an unfamiliar car. It was dark, although there was a faint glow coming from the front dash. I could feel the movement as the car travelled along an uneven road. I tried to force my mind to focus on the last thing that I remembered before I blacked out.
Talking to Emmett…
Realizing that someone had lured me out of my apartment….
Oh no
Someone breaking through my window….
Being grabbed….
A sharp pain in my head as it was struck with something hard….
Ugh. It still hurts
I went to touch the sore spot on my head and realized, to my horror that my wrists were locked together by a set of handcuffs. I was immediately transported back to the day of my mother's murder. I felt the panic begin to rise in my throat as I recalled the feel of wire digging into the flesh of my wrists as I fought to escape Jeff's brutality.
With everything in me, I bit back the scream struggling to escape. At that moment, the driver of the car still thought I was unconscious, and I wanted to keep it that way for as long as possible. After taking a few deep breaths, I tried to concentrate on my surroundings once again.
My head and upper body were lying behind the passenger seat, my legs behind the driver's. I had only to lift my head a few inches to see the identity of my kidnapper. At that exact moment, he began to speak.
"Miserable fucking bitch" He seethed. "Kicked me right in the balls."
Does he know I'm awake?
I started to panic again at the thought.
"Just wait you bitch. Just wait until I get you to the cabin." He muttered. "I'm going to enjoy waking you up; you fucking cunt. I'll make you pay for everything you've taken from me."
I was able to calm my breathing when I realized he still didn't know I was awake.
"I'm going to fuck you up so bad." He said with a sadistic chuckle. "I've been waiting a long time for this day."
His voice was familiar. I raised my head slightly in order to see his face. Luckily his hood was thrown back, and even in the darkness, I was able to make out his features in the dim light of the dashboard.
Ranger Barry Kershner
My head started to spin as I tried to make sense of what was happening. He had kidnapped me.
But why?
Had it been him all along? Was he my flower stalker?
I began to feel angry then, but for the moment, that anger was directed at myself.
As much as I'd promised Edward that I'd stay safe, I'd managed to make a mess of everything. I wanted to cry at how badly I'd probably broken his heart. Not to mention my poor Dad….
Emmett… Rose… Esme… Alice….
As images of my loved ones flashed through my mind, he spoke again.
"I'm going to make your last days a hell on earth" He stated in a low menacing tone. "First, I'm going to fuck you until you can't take any more. Then I'm going to break every bone in your body. There will be nothing left of you to bury by the time they find you." He spat out in his anger and punched the steering wheel as he spoke. "Fucking bitch."
My mouth went dry.
He was planning to kill me.
Rape and torture me first, and then kill me.
All I could see was Jeff's face and remember his words on the day he murdered my mother: 'You were meant for me Isabella. Did you hear what I said? ME and no one else.'
'Your useless whore of a mother took you away from me, but I found you. I will never let you go now.'
The Ranger's words, like Jeff's, chilled me to the bone. I could feel my body start to tremble as I held in a whimper, somehow knowing that my silence was the only thing keeping me alive and untouched at that moment.
How could I fight another sadistic madman? My mother and I together hadn't been strong enough to fight off Jeff.
Also, I hadn't been able to fight off the Ranger when he broke into my car earlier tonight and hit me over the head. I had to face the fact that I was weak and pathetic.
My head still hurt and was bleeding. There was no way I was going to win.
Then my mother's voice came to me again
'You have to be brave and strong. You have to fight. You can do this Bella.'
But how could I fight someone so much stronger than I was? Someone so determined to end my life?
My thoughts then turned to Edward.
In my heart, I knew that Edward would not survive my death. Hadn't he told me as much countless times? Our hearts and souls belonged together always. It was so clear to me now. If I were to leave this world, Edward would not be far behind.
For Edward to go before it was his time was unthinkable. I couldn't allow that to happen.
'You have to fight.'
I could fight, but could I win?
I didn't have a choice any more, I had to win. The more I thought about it the angrier I became. This bastard was not keeping me from the future I'd planned with Edward.
Very carefully and quietly, I stretched my legs. Fortunately for me, I discovered that the Ranger hadn't tied them together.
He probably didn't expect me to wake up this soon.
It was going to be difficult to fight with my hands in cuffs, but I had no choice. There was no way I could let him take me to this cabin he spoke of. I'd never make it out alive. The days of 'victim' Bella were behind me. I was going to fight and I was going to win, or die trying.
The adrenaline was coursing through my body, my heart beating wildly, as I thought about what I needed to do next. My mind formed the beginnings of a plan then, not at all sure of how it would end.
While still lying on my side across the large back seat, I slowly drew my knees up as close to my chest as possible before rolling carefully on to my back.
Thank God I decided to wear Rose's favorite boots today. The ones with the sharp little heels.
I love Rosalie. I surely hope I get to tell her about this.
This was it. I said a silent prayer to God and Saint Michael to help me; I gathered up every last ounce of courage and strength and aimed for the Ranger's head. The first kick would be the most important because I wasn't sure I'd get another. I let fly then with a powerful well-aimed kick, making immediate contact with the side of the Ranger's head.
He let out a strangled curse as my kick caught him by complete surprise. I kicked the side of his head a second time. I kicked it so hard that his head made contact with the side window. "Aah" He shouted as the blood gushed from where my boot heel had torn into his face.
I didn't let up. I kicked and kicked as he tried to grab my legs to make me stop. I knew I was doing some damage when he started to throw wild punches with his right arm, and the car veered off the road straight into the trees.
Everything happened very quickly after that.
His arm was flailing wildly as my boots continued to make contact with his head, his shoulder and his side. One of his punches caught me in the shoulder, then the leg, and another in the side of my chest. It didn't slow me down; I was working on pure adrenaline.
The car barreled through the underbrush. The Ranger suddenly turned his attention forward as he grabbed the wheel with both hands before turning it violently. I kept up my assault as best I could, until the spinning motion of the car sent me hurtling to the floor. I tried to curl into a fetal position to protect myself for what I feared was coming next.
I heard the strangled cry of the Ranger as the driver's side of the car made contact with something. The car lurched violently from side to side. I was thrown into the side door, bumping the cut on my scalp and causing me to cry out in pain. The sounds of shattering glass and metal groaning under protest were the last things I heard before passing out a second time.
-V&V—
When I came to, I lay very still trying to gauge exactly what had happened. It was still dark, and I was still on the floor of the car. If possible, my head hurt more than the last time I woke up. I reached up with my still-cuffed hands and felt the blood that was trickling down my forehead.
I fought the wave of dizziness and nausea that threatened.
All around me was deathly quiet as I held my breath to listen. Very carefully, knowing that my life depended on what I did next, I slowly pulled my legs from under the spot where the driver's seat had been bent back and over them at a strange angle. As I pulled myself up onto the back seat, I noticed that there were no dashboard lights to help me see. I turned my body to face the driver's seat. I could make out the outline of the Ranger as he lay there.
I hoped he was dead, but at the very least I knew he was unconscious. I stared, trying to make out as much as possible in the dark. From what I could see, the entire driver's side door had been twisted and mangled, and was now inside the car. I couldn't make out where the door ended and the Ranger began. The steering column had also been bent at an odd angle, essentially trapping his legs. It was an older model car, and since no airbags had deployed I guessed that it either didn't have them or they malfunctioned.
Thank you God
I sat back, trying to breathe normally for a moment. Every part of my body hurt. I knew that I must be covered in bruises from head to foot, but I was pretty sure that nothing was broken.
I desperately needed to get as far away from the Ranger as possible, but I forced myself to take a moment, and think rationally. My rash decisions of yesterday had led to disaster, so for once I was going to think before I acted.
I looked out my broken window. We were in the woods, that much I knew, but where? There was no way to be certain how far we'd traveled since he'd abducted me. If we were in the forest, it could be days before anyone would find me.
I took a deep breath, wincing at the pain in my side. I didn't have a cell phone, my head was still bleeding slightly, and my hands were cuffed. I wasn't going anywhere in this condition.
I watched the Ranger carefully realizing that he was my best hope for getting out of these handcuffs.
He has to have the key.
Sucking up what little courage I had left, I slowly leaned forward. I could see the keys dangling from the ignition on the steering column. They were hanging down against the Ranger's now trapped legs. I reached toward them with my cuffed and trembling hands. Just as I pulled the keys from the ignition, I yelped in fright as the Ranger's hand suddenly grabbed my forearm, holding it in a death grip.
"You little bitch." He gasped. I could tell he was in pain and struggling to breathe. "I'm going to" –gasp- "fucking kill you." –gasp- "You fucking ruined me" -gasp- "And Geri."
Geri Chance?
I gathered my strength and pushed hard against him with my shoulder, pressing his body against where the crumpled door had him trapped. His grip eased enough for me to pull my arm away as he moaned in pain.
I ignored his muttered curses as I searched the key ring. Being the daughter of a cop, I was familiar with what to look for and within a minute my hands were finally free.
I collapsed back against the seat, trying to calm my racing heart and breathe normally again. The Ranger had grown quiet. I could only guess that he had passed out from the pain.
With my hands free, I was a lot better off than before, and I was certain he had to have a cell phone somewhere in this vehicle.
I just hope it wasn't damaged.
After taking another deep breath and realizing that I was becoming used to the pain, I leaned forward and looked around on the front seat. I was terrified that the Ranger would wake up again, but my desire to get back to Edward and my family controlled my actions at that point. I couldn't see a cell phone anywhere, but I felt around on the seat just to make sure.
Nothing.
I sat back again. It hurt to move. It hurt to breathe. My adrenaline was definitely wearing off.
My choices were either to start walking in hopes of finding another human being before a bear or a cougar found me, or to search the Ranger's pockets for a cell phone. The latter seemed the safest choice since the Ranger's injuries were probably severe enough to keep him from extricating himself from the twisted metal without help.
I gingerly lifted his arm, searching for his jacket pocket underneath. When I found it I slipped my hand inside and thanked God, my Mother, and every Saint in heaven when I felt the hard plastic of a cell phone inside. Just as my fingers wrapped around it, pulling it clear of the pocket, the Ranger gurgled causing me to scream in fright and send the phone flying from my hand.
I looked at him closely, only to realize that his eyes were still closed. After cursing myself for dropping the phone I felt around on the floor near my feet. When my hands wrapped around it again, I was determined not to let go.
Please let it work.
My heart was thumping out of my chest again and I had to calm my shaking hands in order to press the power button. Tears of relief sprang to my eyes as the phone came to life in my hands. I drew in a shaky breath and pressed 9-1-1.
It was only then that I noticed there was no signal. Not one bar.
Of course, I'm probably in the middle of fucking nowhere.
The Ranger moved again, making me jump, but I held onto the phone this time. I sat in the seat debating what to do next. I was battling against the fact that it was still dark. I was injured, nothing broken, but I was bleeding. I needed to get to a place where the cell phone could be traced.
It may have been a rash decision, but I decided that I needed to move. I wasn't willing to wait until I'd lost any more blood, or the Ranger regained consciousness and made another grab for me. I had to move now.
I discovered that my door was damaged, but with a little effort I was able to push it open. After placing my shaky feet on the ground outside the car, I had to hold onto that door for a full minute to steady myself.
I was so dizzy, or maybe woozy was a better word for it, that I sat on the ground next to the car for a few minutes to pull myself together.
The blood was still trickling from the gash in my head, so I took off my hoodie in order to tear the shirt underneath and make a bandage. I then replaced the hoodie because it was fucking freezing out there.
There was no path or sign of a road anywhere near me, so I just chose a direction and began to walk in what I guessed to be a straight line. The next couple of hours were the most terrifying of my life with the exception of the day my mother died.
My head wouldn't stop bleeding. It was just a slow trickle, but I knew I needed stitches. My face hurt, I could tell my lip was swollen, and I was afraid to see when I looked like after the Ranger had smacked me around. My sides and chest hurt so much that breathing was painful; therefore my progress was very slow. I was also extremely tired by this point, but wouldn't stop moving for fear that I'd be discovered and attacked by a wild animal.
Maybe a moving target is a little more difficult to catch
Every time my fatigue threatened to take over, I forced myself to think of Edward and the hell he was probably going through at that moment. The thought enabled me to push through my exhaustion and keep putting one foot in front of the other.
For him
By the time the grey light of dawn began to creep into the forest, I was bent so far over with pain and fatigue that I was practically crawling. I could tell that the ground had been rising slightly for about the last hour, and when I suddenly stumbled out of the trees and found myself in a clearing, I checked the phone again.
There was a signal. A very weak signal, but a signal nonetheless. I moved further into the clearing, and my breath caught in my throat when the signal increased to two bars. I collapsed to the ground. There was no way that I would be able to move another inch. This was it. They would either come find me here, or I would be lost to the elements. I lay down on my side on the wet cold grass, and dialed 9-1-1.
"911, what is your emergency?" Sounded the voice of the operator over the line.
I cleared my throat. "My name is Isabella Swan" I said in a weak voice.
"Yes Miss Swan, can you tell me the nature of your emergency?"
"I was abducted from my car outside of Sequim. I escaped and I'm somewhere in the forest but I don't know exactly where." I added as tears filled my eyes.
"Isabella, I'm placing a trace on your cell phone. Are you injured in any way?"
"My head is bleeding. I feel really light headed." I was crying softly as I spoke. "I hurt all over."
"Please try to stay with me Isabella, we will have someone there to help you as soon as possible." Her voice was beginning to sound far away.
"Please hurry." I choked out. "I'm all alone. I'm frightened."
The operator kept asking me questions. After a while, the need to rest my eyes overtook me. "I need to close my eyes. I'm so tired." I managed to force out.
"Isabella, please try to stay awake. We know where you are now and emergency personnel are on their way.…."
The operator's voice was the last thing I heard before slipping into unconsciousness once again.
-V&V-
*Officer Sarah Burton POV*
As soon as I heard that Charlie Swan's daughter had been abducted, I immediately joined the search. Her car had been found abandoned and damaged on the side of the road outside of Sequim, her cell phone lying on the front seat.
We had no damn idea who this perpetrator was, and if we didn't find a witness or a clue we'd have to wait for DNA evidence gathered from Isabella's car to hopefully point us in the right direction.
As a police officer I knew that if we wanted to find Bella alive, we didn't have time to wait for that. We needed a break.
Search parties set out in every direction from the abandoned car. We searched all night, worried that we were probably missing clues in the dark. Sometime before dawn, we got the break we needed.
A wrecked car had been found in the forest. It was wrapped around a tree, with the driver trapped inside, still alive. I knew that Chief Swan was with one of the teams searching near Sequim. I sent a message letting him know about the wrecked car so that he could meet us there.
When I arrived at the accident scene, the officers who had arrived first advised me that the driver kept slipping in and out of consciousness. During one of his lucid moments, they had been able to determine that he'd kidnapped Bella and that she'd beaten the hell out of him before escaping. When I went to take a look at the guy, I couldn't believe my eyes. That son of a bitch ranger had been the one to abduct Bella. The same one that had assaulted her all those months ago. I wanted to rip his head off, but he looked to be in pretty bad shape already. It would be surprising if he survived this.
The EMTs had to sedate him, so I couldn't get any more information out of him. I walked the couple hundred yards back to the ambulance and waited while the workers tried to extract him from the vehicle.
Sometime later one of the EMTs came back alone to retrieve a black bag from the ambulance. I looked at him questioningly. He shook his head before beginning to speak. "He had a lot of internal injuries. Seems that the crushed door was the only thing keeping him alive. He bled out as soon as it was pulled away." He reported in a serious tone, before walking back toward the wreckage.
I hoped that Bella was okay. The alternative would kill her father.
Poor Charlie
We all knew the stories of what had happened to his ex-wife, and we all witnessed firsthand how hard that had been on him. It seemed exceptionally cruel and unfair that he would have to go through this too.
At that exact moment a call came over the radio that Bella had been located. I sat in my squad car and radioed back, asking for details. The information I received made me hopeful that she would be okay. As I stepped out of my car again, Chief Swan pulled up in his truck. I stepped around my car to greet him, but froze in my tracks when I saw the expression on his face. He wasn't looking at me; he was looking past me with the face of a man who was dying a thousand deaths. I turned to see what had gripped his attention, only to find the EMTs wheeling the gurney carrying the body bag to the ambulance. Charlie took two steps on shaky legs before collapsing onto his knees.
I ran to him and put my hands firmly on his shoulders. "No Charlie. Listen to me, that's not Bella."
"What?" He whispered, his tortured eyes still fixed on the body bag.
"Charlie, that's not her." I spoke urgently. "She got away, they've located her, the emergency crews are on their way to her now."
He still sat there seemingly in shock as he tried to absorb what I was telling him. "She's alive?" He asked hesitantly.
"Yes Charlie. She's alive."
He closed his eyes before taking a deep breath and swallowing hard. "Who?" He asked weakly as he opened his eyes and shot a look at the ambulance.
"That's the son of a bitch who kidnapped her. Ranger Kershner. He's the one who took her Charlie."
Charlie was still kneeling on the ground. He dropped his head and covered his face with his shaking hands before sitting back on his heels. I gently patted his back, comforting as best I could while his entire body shook with the force of his sobs.
-V&V—
*Back to Bella's POV*
In my dreams, my mind was revisiting every happy moment I'd spent with Edward, every murmured 'I love you', every soft caress.
"Ever since I saw you yesterday, you've been on my mind constantly. That's never happened to me before."
"I don't know if I can stay away from you anymore."
"You fascinate me Bella. I didn't know that I could be this attracted to anyone. Tell me you feel it too."
"Beautiful Bella, I can't face a single tomorrow without you. I love you."
"I already miss you. Take care of my heart, I've left it with you."
"I was so afraid I'd lost you."
"I'm looking forward to the day that we won't have to be apart any more Bella."
"Bella, you are the most pleasant form of torture I could think of. Don't feel bad baby. Remember, I've waited a lot of years for you, without even knowing why I waited. I can be patient."
"Bella, from the moment we met, I was drawn to you. You jolted my dead heart to life that day, and now it beats only for you my love. Each day since, I feel more alive than the day before."
"Isabella, please make me the happiest man on earth. Say you'll marry me."
"I love you too Bella, and I can't wait to marry you."
"I love you so much Bella"
"…to know you were carrying our child, something we made together out of love. The thought overwhelms me."
Edward's voice faded away as I began to hear other voices around me. I could hear them, but I couldn't respond.
There was a pinch in my arm, and the feeling of being lifted and moved.
My body started to warm up and the constant pain began to fade away before I slipped into a deeper sleep.
*****A/N*******
Song rec: Metric 'Help I'm Alive'
This is how I envisioned this going down from the moment of the first flower delivery. Hope you liked it.
One quick mention: part of this chapter is told from Officer Sarah Burton's POV. If you remember, she was the Seattle police officer that used to work in Forks with Charlie. She helped Bella after her ordeal in the Park.
Anxious to hear your thoughts. We will find out more about the Ranger's motives, etc in the next chap.
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