The next week flew by. Thankfully, my classes were not difficult. Unlike a lot of students, I had taken courses every summer. Most of what I was taking now were electives that I needed to take in order to complete the required credits for graduation.It gave me a secret satisfaction that my nerdy, bookish ways turned out to be good for something. Now, they enabled me to plan a trip to England without feeling guilty about missing a day of class.
Tuesday was by far the strangest day of my week. Dr. Stone, one of my professors called me into her office. After I was seated, she began.
“Bella, I won’t take up much of your time.” She smiled. “I just wanted to know if you’ve given any thought to what you’ll be doing after you graduate?”
My mind and every other part of me had been so wrapped up in Edward that I hadn’t given any thought to after graduation since the day my advisor had insulted me.
“No, actually everything is so up in the air right now.” I hesitated and bit my lip, hard.
Dr. Stone gave me a sympathetic smile. Of course she knew about my relationship with Edward, everyone did. “Listen, I hope you won’t be upset, but I was talking about you to one of the other professors.”
Huh?
“And I showed him one of your essays.” She looked at me apologetically.
I knew that Dr. Stone always enjoyed my writing but….
“You may or may not know that Dr. Baird is a published author.” She kept searching my face for a reaction. “He was very impressed with your work and wants you to write something and, with you permission, he would like to show it to a magazine publisher friend of his.”
What the .. ?
“I know you weren’t looking for something like this right now, but it really couldn’t hurt to see if it leads anywhere.” She prompted.
I was stunned. I’d always said I wanted to write, but I assumed it would be years down the road before I’d be able to publish anything.
Wow.
I thought for a few minutes about this.
“I think I would be agreeable to it, under one condition.” I said quietly.
“What would that be?” Dr. Stone asked.
“I don’t want this publisher knowing who I am. Anything he reads can’t have my name on it. I don’t want my relationship with Edward influencing the way anyone views my work.”
Dr. Stone smiled and nodded slowly. “That’s a very prudent request Bella. I am really pleased you are going to allow this.”
My brain suddenly started working overtime, coming up with questions that immediately spewed from my mouth.
“How long should my writing sample be? Is there a particular subject matter? When do I need to have it completed?”
‘Hold on Bella.” Dr. Stone said with a chuckle. “Just relax. Remember, this may not even pan out. To answer your questions, two thousand words would be sufficient for the length. If the publisher is interested, I’m sure he’ll ask for more. With regard to subject matter, you could expand on the essay I showed to Dr. Baird.”
“Which one was that?” I asked.
“The one about the young family spending the afternoon at Qwest Field. It was so entertaining. You were able to take a seemingly mundane event, and make it interesting and humorous. Just work on it and bring something to me by Monday.”
“Okay, well thanks Dr. Stone. I’ll have something prepared in a few days.”
“Have a good week Bella.”
After leaving Dr. Stone’s office, I decided to keep the subject matter of our meeting to myself. I would wait to see the outcome before building up anyone’s hopes, including my own.
On Thursday, I went to class and work. I was just about to leave for the day, when a vase of yellow carnations was delivered to my cubicle. The card was unsigned, and merely read:
Looking forward to a ‘private dance’ with you very soon
This was confusing. Edward had sent me pink roses just last week, and the note sent with them was handwritten by him. I finally got him to admit that he’d made arrangements with the florist to deliver his handwritten note with his order.
He finds new ways every day to touch my heart.
These flowers weren’t Edward’s style at all, and the note was just weird.
Edward was the only one I’d ever done a ‘private dance’ for.
I mentally kicked myself again for doing that skype belly dance, but kept telling myself how much Edward told me he liked it.
He’s actually told you several times since Saturday that he loved it.
Shut the fuck up Bella and just enjoy the fact that your boyfriend thinks you’re sexy.
I left the flowers on my desk and headed home with Rose.
“Bella, the photos of us dancing are all over the internet. Those flowers could be from anyone.” Rose told me once we arrived home. “But, in order to remove all doubt, you should ask Edward.”
That night on skype, I did just that.
“So, how are you?” I asked him with a smile.
“Missing my girl.” He grinned.
Deciding to get straight to the point, I asked him “Edward, you didn’t send me flowers today did you?”
His brow furrowed. “You got flowers?”
I nodded.
“I didn’t send them Bella.” He frowned. “They were unsigned?”
I nodded again and bit my lip.
“I don’t think I’m comfortable with some strange guy sending you flowers. Where were they sent?”
“To WIRI. So, it’s not like he has my home address or anything.” I answered.
“That’s true. I still don’t like it. Was there a card?”
“Yes.”
“And?” He pressed. “What did it say Bella?” He sounded a little irritated.
“Just something about looking forward to a ‘private dance’ with me soon.”
“The fuck you say.” He was angry now.
“Listen Edward, Rose and I discussed this. The photos from our club hopping are all over the internet, along with video from our belly dancing lesson.” I cringed as I admitted this. “Everyone’s probably seen it by now.”
Including my Dad. That’s going to be a fun conversation. I plan to blame Rose.
Edward was visibly upset. “Bella, promise me you won’t go anywhere alone.”
“Edward, you’re overreacting.”
“Please Bella.” He sounded desperate. “I’m so far away, I’ll go out of my mind if I have to worry about your safety.”
“Of course Edward. Please don’t concern yourself with this any more. I promise not to go anywhere alone.”
Silly boy. He worries entirely too much about me.
He breathed visibly in relief. I felt the need to change the subject.
“So are you ready for movie night tomorrow, er, I guess it’s tonight for you.” I asked.
He grinned. “Yes I am. I can’t wait baby. I should be back here by five tonight. Speaking of that, I’d better go. You get some sleep and I’ll see you tomorrow morning your time.”
I nodded, hating to say goodbye. “I love you Edward.”
“I love you too Bella. Sweet dreams.”
--V&V--
My dreams that night, or at least what I remember of them were sweet. Normally I would only say that if Edward had been in them, however this time he wasn’t.
I was running through the woods. It felt as if I was running away from something rather than toward something. I suddenly stumbled into a beautiful clearing filled with wildflowers, and a feeling of utter peace overwhelmed me. When I looked around I could see a woman sitting over on a blanket preparing a picnic. As I studied her movements from a distance, I gasped in shock.
“Mom.” I whispered as I began to run to her. She stood to face me and waited with open arms. I threw myself into them and started to cry into my mother’s neck as she rubbed my hair.
“Sweetie, it’s okay.” she soothed.
“Mom, how are you here?” I said when I could finally speak.
She smiled and gestured for me to sit with her. I sat down, but couldn’t let go of her hand.
“Remember the picnic we attempted, and you were attacked by bees?” She asked with a smile.
“Yes, it was terrible, but you made everything better Mom.” I whispered as she smiled. “I miss you so much.”
“I know you do honey, I feel it. I’m okay though and I check in quite often on you and Emmett… and Charlie.” She answered quietly.
“Do you know that Rose and Emmett are getting married?”
“Yes, that was wonderful news. The wedding will be beautiful.” She answered.
“Listen sweetie, I need to tell you something before I go.”
“Don’t go Mom.” I could feel my eyes begin to well-up with tears.
“I have to honey..you‘re going to wake up soon. I’ll visit you again. I promise.” She said as she pulled me into a hug.
“Bella, I want you to remember something. Even when things are at their darkest and seem hopeless, you have to fight. Promise me you’ll fight with everything in you. Don‘t give up.”
I wish I understood what she’s talking about.
“Okay Mom, I promise.” I whispered.
“Everything will work out if you do that. You will have a beautiful life Bella. I love you. Always.” She said as she brushed the back of her hand across my cheek.
“I love you too Mom.” I could feel myself waking up as the dream faded away.
I sat up in bed, grabbing a tissue to wipe the tears from my face. Just the thought that my Mother could check in on us made me so happy, while also giving me a profound sense of peace.
I tried to tell myself that the entire thing was probably manufactured by my subconscious, but even I wasn’t buying my own bullshit.
No, I deserve this after all the misery I’ve been forced to endure.
So I held on to the dream.
After dressing for the day, I ate breakfast and worked on homework until Edward returned from filming. I was already connected to skype and waiting for him when he walked into his bedroom.
“Someone’s anxious for movie night.” He smiled. “Sorry I’m a little late. Did you have a good night?”
I smiled as I thought about my dream. “I did. It would have been better if you were here of course.” I admitted.
He grinned his crooked smile. “I’m going to take a quick shower. Dinner is being delivered to the room, then we can watch the movie together.”
“I’ll be here waiting Mr. Movie Star.” I was so happy. Even though we were thousands of miles apart, Edward and I were spending the next few hours together.
We’d decided that since I was off every Friday, we’d make it our ’movie night’. We would each get a copy of a movie we wanted to watch, and view it together.
Today is was ’Pirate Radio’. Neither of us had gotten to see it in the theaters.
After Edward ate, we both got bowls of popcorn and prepared to watch the movie. It took a few minutes to get them in sync, then we both settled in our beds to enjoy our movie night.
We both started chuckling after realizing that one of the major plotlines in the story was about ‘Young Carl’ losing his virginity.
“We can never escape that shit can we Isabella?” Edward laughed.
I laughed too. “I think Young Carl’s definitely going to lose his virginity by the end of the movie Edward. He’s awfully cute.”
“So you think Tom Sturridge is cute do you?” Edward asked with mock jealousy.
“He’s adorable.” I grinned.
By the time the movie was over I added “He’s got a cute butt too.”
I think I actually heard Edward growl. “Don’t get jealous Edward, yours is cuter.”
Oh shit why did I just blurt that out?
Edward gave me a wicked smile. “Miss Swan, that was an appallingly shocking thing to say.”
“Eh, yeah. Well Edward, um, I did see your naked butt in September Ends. I believe you were already aware of that.”
Attempting to cover my own ass while talking about his. Brilliant Bella.
Edward was still smirking at me. “You know Miss Swan, I’m at a loss here.”
“Why’s that?” I asked, hoping he was changing the subject.
“You’ve seen mine, but I haven’t seen yours.”
Sexward should be required to give me a ‘heads-up’ before he arrives. These surprise appearances will be the death of me.
“Uh. Um. I’ve never seen it in person, only on the movie screen.”
So there Sexward. How can you answer that?
“I’ll show you mine right now if you show me yours first?” He answered with a smirk.
Day-um.
I cleared my throat and a nervous giggle escaped my mouth. “Maybe I would have done that the other night Edward. But today there is zero alcohol in my system. I’m not mooning you on skype.”
He cocked his head to one side, still smirking. “That’s too bad.” Then a brilliant smile took over his features.
“Bella, really what’s the big deal? It’s not like I’m asking for a frontal view.” He smirked again and laughed. “Okay, I’ll admit that as much as I’d enjoy seeing any part of your body on skype, I guess I’d rather wait to see some parts in person. But Bella, I’m definitely not covering my eyes if you decide to flash me.“
“Stop teasing me.” I giggled again. I knew my face had to be a bright shade of red by now.
“I’m not teasing baby. Just remember, my offer still stands, among others I’ve made.” He was still smiling brilliantly.
“What’s gotten into you?” I smiled back.
“Just missing you.” He said quietly. The smirk permanently etched on his gorgeous face.
We spent the rest of Edward’s evening talking about everything. Every once in a while Sexward would arrive back on the scene to drive me crazy. All too soon it was time for Edward to sleep.
We said our goodbyes and I mentally calculated how many days it was until I would see him in person.
Twelve, hopefully short, days until we were together again.
--V&V--
The next day while in the grocery store, Rose called me.
“Hey Bells.“
“Hi Rose, what’s up?“ I asked as I put a couple items in the cart.
“Bells, I didn’t call you last night because I knew you were on skype with Edward most of yesterday, and I didn’t want to interrupt.”
“Okay, so what’s going on?” I was becoming a bit concerned.
“Well, I threw away your flowers yesterday. I hope you don’t mind.”
“No that’s fine Rose. I know Edward didn’t send them, I guess they’re from some random guy that saw me dancing at the club.”
“Yeah, that’s what I think too, but…” She trailed off.
“But what Rose?” It wasn’t like her to not get to the point.
“Well, it’s just that I looked up the meaning of yellow carnations, just out of curiosity you know?“
“And?” I asked.
“It probably means nothing, but I thought you should know, just in case it does mean something.”
“Rose, just get to the point.”
“It’s kind of creepy Bella. If you send someone yellow carnations it’s supposed to mean that you’re disappointed in them or they’ve rejected you. Like I said, it probably means nothing. Most likely the guy that sent them likes yellow carnations. I doubt he was sending you a message.” She tried to play it off, but I could tell she was a little worried.
“Thanks for telling me Rose. Knowledge is never a bad thing. I mean, it’s better to know as much as possible, just in case.”
She sighed. “Yeah, you’re right. We all tend to overreact where you’re concerned Bells.”
“I know, thank you. I love you Rose.”
“Love you too Bells. See you later.”
When I went to the checkout, I was still thinking about what Rose had said. Whether or not it was some kind of stalker who sent the flowers, or just some delusional guy who wanted to date me, I decided not to share this latest information with Edward until I got to England.
There’s less of a chance he’ll freak out after hearing this if I’m with him where he knows I'm safe.
My mind was suddenly pulled away from all thoughts of my potential stalker when I glimpsed the newest rack of tabloids. The covers contained photos of Rose, our friends and me dancing in various clubs around Seattle. The headlines said it all:
Virgin Bella enjoys night out with friends, while Edward lives the quiet life in London.
What the fuck? I was afraid our drunken conversations in the club would be overheard.
True love transforms playboy into chivalrous protector of girlfriend’s virtue.
Okay, well at least they realize Edward and I did not split up. But this is beyond embarrassing.
I couldn’t help myself, I needed to know what was written in the articles, so I bought the stupid magazines. Every. Damn. One.
The articles took what someone overheard me saying to my friends and expanded it into a couple of pages in each tabloid. They went on and on about my traumatic life, and the fact that I’d never dated until Edward. They spoke of how we were holding off ‘doing the deed’ until I was ready, and how this was a huge lifestyle change for Edward. I snickered at that.
Oh if they only knew.
I couldn’t complain too much about the articles, because they made Edward out to be just as wonderful as he really was. They even explained the belly dancing photos accurately.
Don’t get used to it Bella. They just happened to stumble upon the truth this time.
That afternoon, while hanging out with Rose and Emmett the subject of the gossip rags came up. “Bells, it’s even worse on the internet. We discussed this. If you’re going to date Edward, you have to be tough.”
“I know. it’s just hard to adjust to the fact that people would be listening in to my conversations so intently.”
“You make them money sweetie. That’s all you are to them. Forget about it, and live your life.”
Edward was none too pleased about their subject matter when he found out about them thanks to Alec, although he made sure to tell me that the photos of me dancing were ‘hot’.
On Wednesday, I spent all day working at WIRI. At a few minutes before noon, Rose went to a lunch meeting, so I was left alone in her office working on interview questions for an upcoming show.
It was almost one o’clock before I decided to break away from my work to get something to eat.
As I stood waiting for my order at the corner sandwich shop, I heard someone behind me, “Well if it isn’t little Miss Swan.”
The hairs on the back of my neck stood up at the sound of that voice. I turned slightly to see Victor James, the star of WIRI’s news team, standing behind me, leering.
Creepy.
Rose had warned me before I even started working there about what a sleazy character he was. He wasn’t a very good reporter, and gained most of his popularity because of his sex appeal.
Ewww. Okay Bella, not everyone’s lucky enough to have an Edward.
True.
Feeling the need to be nothing more than polite, I gave Mr. James a tight smile and turned back to the front.
This obviously wasn’t enough for him because he moved until he was uncomfortably close beside me.
“From what I saw on the internet, you seem to be handling your separation from Masen fairly well.”
Well that was a bit too personal.
I was torn between telling him to fuck off, or just ignoring him. Something about this guy made me decide to be careful. He wasn’t like Mike Newton, a pesky asshole that you could scare away. Victor James seemed almost sinister.
“I’m perfectly fine. He has a job, I have school and work.“
That was probably too much information, but I didn’t know what else to say.
James pursed his lips as he thought. “So you and your friends were just out enjoying your freedom?”
“Something like that.” Thankfully, my order was up so I grabbed my food and prepared to leave.
I hate the fact that everyone knows entirely too much about me. Stupid girls’ night out. Stupid belly dancing. Stupid Bella.
Just as I reached for the door, I heard Victor James again. “You have a nice day Miss Swan.”
I just nodded and left.
Why, all of a sudden did Victor James even notice my existence? I knew the answer to my question before I had even asked it.
Edward.
Because of Edward, I’ve become attractive to men that wouldn’t give me a second glance before.
Jerks.
When I informed Rose of our encounter, she reiterated that I should stay away from Victor James.
“He’s a creep Bella. A well-known creep. He likes to go after young women, the more challenging their situation, the better. You, my dear are exactly what he likes.”
“What are you talking about Rose?” I started to feel a little nervous.
“You’ve got a hot, rich, famous boyfriend. You’re both madly in love with each other. You present quite the challenge to Mr. James. Unfortunately, the fact that you’re still carrying your v-card probably has him panting like the fucking dog he is.”
Trust Rose to be brutally honest.
She must have seen the worry on my face. “Bella relax. That fucker wouldn’t try anything or I’d have his ass.” She reassured.
--V&V--
On Thursday, a package arrived from Alice. Inside, I found my flight information for Tuesday, along with a hotel room keycard, a dress, shoes, and a note.
Bella,
I’ve enclosed your flight info. Also, Alec was able to secure an extra key to Edward’s suite. I’m not sure of his filming schedule for the day you arrive, but hopefully you’ll be able to surprise him!
The enclosed dress and shoes are for when he takes you out to dinner. (I saw that you’d need them).
Have a wonderful time. I’m very excited for you both. He misses you terribly.
Love, Alice
I clutched the flight information to my chest, butterflies fluttering in my stomach.
If I don’t calm down by the time I board my plane, I may just go up in flames.
On Saturday, I spent every minute that I wasn’t talking to Edward or doing homework, packing. With every item I added to my suitcase, my smile grew.
Three more days until I boarded that plane.
That evening I made dinner for Emmett and Rose. After we ate, as Emmett and I played video games, Rose brought out the most recent gossip rags.
I wasn’t sure how to feel about the latest front page news. My relationship with Edward wasn’t the top story, but it was related.
It seems that one of the women that had been seen on Edward’s arm a couple of years ago had decided to cash in on the recent stories about us. From what I could tell, her career hadn’t panned out the way she’d expected, so I’m sure sharing her personal experiences about Edward Masen seemed like a good idea.
She actually told the truth, revealing that their ‘date’ had been set up by the studio, and that Edward had been a perfect gentleman. Far from having had sex, she admitted that they’d never even kissed.
I silently wondered if this would be the beginning of a number of similar stories, and how those stories would impact the public’s opinion of Edward.
Once again, Edward came away from this story looking like a hero. I told myself not to get used to the positive treatment by the press, because it could sour at any moment.
The night before my trip, I hung out at Rose and Emmett’s while I knew Edward was sleeping. Emmett had been very subdued all evening, so I finally asked him why.
He looked a little sheepish. “I had a talk with Father Pat today. I drove to Port Angeles and met him for lunch.”
“So why the sad face?” I asked. I noticed that Rose was smirking at us.
“He chewed my ass out Bells when I told him about all the sex we’d been having because of that abstinence shit hanging over my head. He said he doubted I was really sincere about my intentions to rejoin the church.“
“I told him I really was, and promised to do anything he suggested to prove it.“
Rose started to giggle. “Tell Bella what you’re doing next weekend Emmett.“
He grinned. “I’m going on retreat with Father Pat and a bunch of other guys. He said he only trusted me to attend one if he went also. Something about keeping an eye on me.”
“It’s supposed to help me focus and come away a little more dedicated.” He shrugged. “Then I’ll rejoin the church, and he expects abstinence until the wedding day.”
I was somehow very glad that I’d be in England next weekend. God help those other retreat attendees.
Later that night, I reluctantly lied to Edward.
“So, tomorrow night I won’t be home to skype with you Edward. Joanna, Tara and I are having a study session, and I’m spending the night with them.”
He looked sad. “Okay baby. Can you phone me at least?”
“Sure. I can do that.“
Shit, I don’t know how, since I’ll be on a flight. I’m going to have to get Alice or Rose to cover for me.
I hate lying to him, but it will be sooo worth it if he’s surprised.
--V&V--
It was finally here. The day I would fly to London to see my Edward. My bags were packed and waiting in the car with Lou who was driving me straight to the airport after class. I had a light lunch with Joanna and Tara, who were almost as excited as I was about my trip.
After my last class, I sprinted from the building, pretty sure that my feet barely made contact with the ground.
I was so happy to be boarding that plane, that I didn’t care if the paps or anyone else took my photo, because by the time Edward heard about it, I would hopefully be in his arms.
Rose was supposed to call Edward tonight to tell him that I was having phone problems earlier in the day, so I wouldn’t be calling him
.
With all my bases covered, I boarded my flight, settled into my first class seat and tried to relax. Before we even took off, the flight attendant offered me something to drink. I turned down anything alcoholic, wanting to have a clear head while traveling alone. Instead I settled in with my cup of tea and continued reading Lord of The Rings to pass the time.
With my seat reclined, and my privacy barriers in place, I curled up and let my mind drift away to Middle Earth.
Alice was right, first class is the shit!
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